Here in the heart of the Great American Southwest, our usual and highly prized aridity has been rinsed away this winter, by an unseemly and continuous train of supercharged subtropical rainstorms. Everything is turning green, and squishy sounds are heard across the land.

Yes, the soon-to-arrive desert flower display will be awesome, but those flowers are there for a reason. Bugs! Sure as God made little green chiggers, those hard-shelled interlopers will see the high humidity as a mandate to go utterly hog wild. Oh lordy!

And then.. and then, will come the Locusts. Oh yes, unstoppable hordes, munching across the emerald desert floor. Their legions shall darken the sun, and the people will tremble at the sight!

But then, at long last, Old Sol will complete his journey to the north. This rocky land will dry and bleach once more, and the wild frenzy of Spring will be but a memory, as the Creatures of the Night reclaim their domain.